Retro Review: WCW Uncensored 1995

Uncensored 1995 - Ric Flair

Hello everyone! I’m in a good mood this Sunday as my Maryland Terrapins won a game in the NCAA Tournament. So I decided to ride the high for all of you and watch a really bad show: Uncensored 1995.

This show contains the second Hulk Hogan vs Vader match. The first match did really well on PPV, so it is only natural to run it back here. The problem? Neither one of these guys would ever job clean. So the first match ended in a DQ win for Hogan after a returning Ric Flair returned.

The original plan called for the match to be stopped because of excessive bleeding by one of the men. But the Maryland Athletic commission nixed that idea. The idea would have lead to the Uncensored PPV, where the match could not be stopped because of blood. But that wasn’t the case.

I’ll admit that I may be bias here (being the huge Vader mark that I am), but Vader should have won the title in the first match. Hogan doesn’t realize Vader beating him then building back up to Hogan eventually regaining the title is money. So since Hogan didn’t want to lose, and Vader wouldn’t given his status in Japan, we got a series of awful match ending between these two men.

The show starts with the promo that would air in the weeks that build to the show. It just didn’t include where to buy the show. That was weird.

Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Bobby “The Brain” Heenan are on commentary. They remind us right before the show that Hulk Hogan revealed his “ultimate surprise” to help him in his strap match against Vader. They teased for weeks that it would be the Ultimate Warrior by showing a silouette that looked just like him. But it ended up being The Renegade, someone with a very similar body structure (i.e. steroids). Wise to reveal it before the PPV so fans didn’t get pissed buying the show expecting Warrior.

King of the Road Match: Dustin Rhodes vs The Blacktop Bully

This match was taped the day before in the back of a semi filled with hay bales. To win the match you have to get to the horn in the truck and blare it to win. That’s the horn in the back of the truck not on the steering wheel. Blacktop Bully is Barry Darsow, who had about a million different gimmicks in WCW. Imagine being stuck behind this on the road? Dustin uses a bale of hay on Darsow. Would that actually hurt? Maybe if you had allergies.

The Bully uses a rope on Dustin and he is busted open. Bobby Heenan is hilarious during this whole match on commentary. He wants to make a citizen’s arrest for the semi running a stop sign. At least these bumps are more comfortable on hay than a regular wrestling ring. Seeing a backdrop on hay is quite funny though. Darsow is busted open too now as the semi makes a wide turn almost ending up on someone’s front lawn.

As the semi passes a trailer park Bobby Heenan calls them the beautiful condos of Tupelo. They pass a barn and Heenan calls it downtown Tupelo with a whole two story skyscraper. Hilarious. A church bus causes the semi to stop. Imagine the people in the church bus looking over and seeing two guys fighting in the back of a semi?

Both men are fighting on the edge of the semi as they hang from it. Dustin gets knocked off but the Bully can’t get to the horn. The Bully charges at Dustin but Dustin backdrops him onto the hay. I can only guess this match is going this long to make the rental of the semi worth it. Both men are near the horn as The Bully knocks Dustin off and honks it to get the win.

So, the story here is that both guys would be fired after the match. There was a no blood policy at the moment in WCW and both men bladed. Darsow was eventually brought back but never really used. Dustin said screw it and left for the WWF. He would go on to become a pretty well known character called Goldust.

Martial Arts Match: Meng w/Col. Rob Parker vs Hacksaw Jim Duggan

Duggan comes out looking like a complete bufoon. Way more than normal. Someone has a sign that says “Duggan for President.” Only in Tupelo, Bobby says. Sonny Onoo is our special referee. Onoo tries getting Duggan to bow but he won’t and does the only thing he could ever do in his career and get the crowd to chant “USA.”

Meng lands a kick as Duggan finally bows and I guess the match starts? I never heard a bell. Duggan takes off his boots and uses them on Meng. I guess that is legal under martial arts rules. Although it is Uncensored and there are no rules. Men keeps using nerve holds to slow Duggan down, probably because Duggan is already gassed.

Once Duggan has caught his breath he starts his comeback. Meng gets right up from his clothesline as Duggan knocks Parker down. Duggan also grabs Onoo and while he does, Meng kicks Duggan and gets the pin. Somehow the King of the Road match was better than this.

We get this really weird Arn Anderson video package with him cutting a promo from outside a SUV at some work site. I guess that means he is here to work.

Wrestler vs Boxer: Arn Anderson w/Col. Rob Parker vs Johnny B. Badd

Johnny B. Badd is apparently representing boxing in this match. Shouldn’t this make him the heel in the match since this is a wrestling show? Badd is also wearing boxing gloves in the match. So he is trying to box while Anderson is trying to wrestle. This is all kinds of stupid. The match is ten 3 minute rounds and can be won by pinfall, submission or KO.

The 1st round just has Badd landing shots in the corner on Arn. So I guess Badd wins the 1st round base on points? Parker tells Anderson to take Badd’s legs down. Anderson tries doing that but Badd knocks him down. Anderson finally gets Badd down but Anderson misses an elbow then Badd knocks him down again. Badd just keeps landing shots on Arn. Man does Arn look like a complete jobber here. Badd wins Round 2 based on points again I guess.

After the round ends Arn hits a DDT on Badd. Arn then attacks Badd a few seconds later and as Arn tells referee Randy Anderson, it is No DQ. So what can the ref do? Arn lands some shots then tosses Badd into the corner where Parker had a stool that Arn threw Badd in to. Arn then hits a spinebuster so the match is guaranteed at least 1/4*. Badd’s old corner man Rock Finnegan comes in and jumps on Arn but Arn throws him off. The round ends and I’ll say Arn took it. 2-1 Badd after three.

Arn attacks Badd again during the rest period. He goes after Finnegan. He puts a bucket on Arn’s head then Badd clocks him with a left then again with the bucket off and Arn is down for the ten count after the round started. I’ll give them credit for the end because the crowd popped for it. But otherwise another giant dud.

Macho Man Randy Savage vs Avalanche

Avalanche is out here looking exactly like Earthquake. He even comes out to a theme quite similar to his WWF one. He also quickly gets the upper hand on Savage and even hits a dropkick. Avalanche tosses Savage to the outside then into the post.

This match has been all Quake, I mean Avalanche from the start. It kind of kills the crowd and I am surprised Savage even went through with all of this selling. Savage has enough strength to move out of the way of an Avalanche drop. Savage shows a flurry of offense but Avalanche catches him and slams him down. Avalanche misses a second rope splash and goes to the outside. Savage is able to hit his classic ax handle off the top.

Suddenly a female comes out of the audience and attacks Savage. They go back into the ring and this lady struts then takes off the wig to show it is actually Ric Flair. Savage gets hit with an Avalanche Drop then Hogan comes and makes the save. And it is announced that Randy Savage wins, by DQ. I THOUGHT THIS SHOW WAS UNCENSORED AND ANYTHING GOES IN EVERY MATCH? I guess that doesn’t apply to Hulk Hogan or Randy Savage. I love Savage but come on man, take the loss there. This is a classic sign of WCW’s awful booking in 1995 because of Hulk Hogan and his buddies running the show.

At this point I am questioning why I did this even in the good mood I am currently in.

Sting vs Big Bubba Rogers

For those keeping track at home. In less than two years, Ray Traylor went from debuting in WCW in late 1993 as The Boss, then to the Guardian Angel because The Boss was literally the Big Bossman with a shorter name, to Big Bubba Rogers to cement his heel turn. We get to hear “Man Called Sting” so the show is starting an upswing.

Unlike the last match Sting starts off in control, which is the smart thing to do in these matches. Sting knocks Bubba to the outside but Sting pulls his feet back. Bubba forgets he has to go forward into the post and there is an awkward second where he doesn’t then just runs into the post himself. Sting chases Bubba outside the ring then back in. Sting tries leap frogging Bubba but Bubba’s head hits Sting’s knee and it takes Sting out. I think that was meant to happen but in a way I am not sure.

Heenan says Sting is lucky it isn’t worse because in this town if you go to the hospital with a bad leg they shoot you. Ha. Bubba starts working over the leg of Sting. Heenan says Bubba won’t sue Sting, because Sting doesn’t have a leg to stand on. Heenan is making this show at least a 2 out of 10.

Bubba slips up and Sting hits a forearm off the top. He then slams Bubba al while selling the knee the entire time. Sting applies a sleeper but Bubba uses his tie to pull Sting down for a jaw breaker. Why didn’t IRS ever do that? Sting comes back with a belly-to-belly then a splash off the top for two. Sting goes for another bodyslam but Bubba falls on him and gets the pinfall victory. You see, since Sting wasn’t an original Hogan buddy it is okay for him to lose here. But Savage? No way brother.

Falls Count Anywhere Tornado Tag Match: Harlem Heat (c) w/Sister Sherri vs The Nasty Boys

Sherri comes out on her own without Harlem Heat. Sherri goes to the ramp after the Nastys come out, allowing Harlem Heat to jump them from behind to start the match. The teams pair off to start the match. Sherri comes into the ring but gets the Pit Stop from the Nastys. Sags dumps a garbage can over the head of Stevie Ray.

The teams then brawl to a conveniently placed concession set up. We’ve got a lemonade stand, funnel; cakes, and popcorn stand setup. The lemonade gets all over the floor and everyone is slipping on it. I see no funnel cakes at that stand, only cotton candy. What a let down. The Nastys cover Harlem Heat in mustard. Sherri gets rolled around in all of the mess.

Sherri ends up in the garbage can. Knobbs and Booker T end up breaking the funnel cakes stand as Heenan says that is someone’s house in Tupelo. Knobbs got the win after that but we don’t actually see it because the camera went with Sags and Stevie Ray. This match was also non title. We see the replay and it looks like Booker actually kicks out before the three count. And apparently this match was not for the title.

Strap Match: Hulk Hogan (c) vs Vader w/Ric Flair

The story throughout the show has been that Jimmy Hart is missing. Vader showed up on the preshow with Jimmy Hart’s jacket. So Vader probably killed him or something. Michael Buffer calls Hogan the “King of Hulk-Mania” which he did for awhile. Bobby Heenan is upset for how crazy Flair has gone. The crowd is more behind Hogan than they were at Superbrawl last month.

Flair and Vader have Hogan cornered until we get the Renegade. He looks just like the Warrior with his face paint on. Poor Flair has to sell for Renegade as the match apparently starts during all of this. There isn’t even a referee out there. How the hell has the match started? Flair gets into the ring but Hogan hits him with the strap. Renegade then chases him back up the aisle.

Vader has already lost the mask by the way. And he runs right into Hogan and takes him down. Vader then connects on a Vader Bomb off the top then chokes Hogan with the strap. Jimmy Hart suddenly shows up, escaping from wherever he was. Hogan is also no longer attached to the strap at this point. Vader goes to use a chair on Hogan but Jimmy Hart yells at him from behind. So Vader turns around to go at him. Hogan grabs the chair and uses it on Vader.

Somehow Flair and Renegade end up in the ring while Vader and Hogan are on the outside fighting. That eventually changes as Hogan uses the strap on Vader in the ring. Hogan is still not connected to the strap by the way. And there is still no referee. As Vader splashes Hogan Tony Schiavone FINALLY says why there is no ref. Apparently WCW wiped their hands of this match. That still makes no sense.

Hogan hulks up and takes out Vader. He gets three corner but a masked man comes out and hits Jimmy Hart with a wooden chair. Flair does the same to Hogan in the ring and ad Renegade on the outside as pieces of wood go flying into the crowd. Vader gets three corners but Flair stops him and tells Vader to go to the top. Vader does and misses of course.

Flair grabs another chair as he pulls Vader out of the ring. Flair hits Hogan but Hogan hulks up. Hogan grabs Flair and hits all four corners as the bell rings. Heenan screams that Hogan has to do that to Vader not Flair and he has a point. Vader attacks after the match and we have a standoff between Flair/Vader and Hogan/Renegade. A masked man come out with a chair and joins Flair and Vader. But then we cut to a tied up Arn and it is Savage in this mask and he takes out Flair and Vader.

What a giant mess. This is why these early Hogan years of WCW are awful. Hogan would never job so you have to go to extreme, ludicrous measures in order for him to get wins. And that leads to this. Ric Flair and Vader take losses here technically, which probably has Hogan grinning ear to ear. Flair never got an equal shake in WCW. He was forced to retire in October after his loss to Hogan and comes back four months later. Flair was always willing to do business, and that was part of the problem. He was pushed to the side far too often once Hogan came in.

This show is awful. Do not watch it. But it didn’t ruin my good mood so I am all good over here still.